Personal
(Muhammad Adib : paling kanan)
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Thats the only words that I can typed on June 26th 2024, then I put it in my draft. And today July 30th 2025, a year has passed. Yeap, my beautiful kid left me.
Adib, what a nice name yet "berhantu" atau "berat"... Sekarang aku percaya ada certain-certain nama yang berat nak bawak. Contohnya nama anak aku: Muhammad Adib (adab/budi pekerti yang terpuji).
Yeap, Adib tinggal aku. Tinggal ayah dia, tinggal Maya. dan paling pedih, dia tinggalkan kembar dia: Yeop/Muhammad Adil.
Only 4 years, he accompanied his brother, played by his side. And poof, Allah ambik dia. Aku hilang anak aku. Adil hilang kembarnya, Maya hilang salah sorang abangnya. Semuanya bermula hari Jumaat, 7 Jun 2024. Dia balik tabika pukul 2.30 petang. Aku ajak sambung tido, sebab Maya tido. Dan dorang akur, dorang tido di sebelah kiri dan kanan aku. Pukul 5 petang lebih kurang, aku terjaga. Adib bising nak berak. Dan Maya pun dah jaga, dorang dah start warm up nak main. Aku tunggu Adib berak. Sempatlah dia bisingkan Maya masuk tandas nak kacau dia. Dia settle berak, dia cebok, dia pakai seluar. Aku bising sebab dia tak flush. Yada yada yada pukul 6.30 petang, dia lari masuk tandas balik. Muntah. Startlah drama pesemua, ayah dia sampai (ayah dia shoot nikah petang Jumaat tu).
Dan perkara yang jadi ni dah biasa pada aku dan A. Adib kerap tak keraplah sakit perut, aku bawak klinik, jumpa DR, balik. Begitulah rutin setiap kali dia sakit perut. Jadi aku dan A anggap benda ni normal. Sebabnya? Jumaat tu ada Hari Mengenal Buahan Tempatan di tabika dia. Jadi aku syak dia makan banyak. Dan memang selalunya kalau tersilap makan, dia akn jadi macam tu. Sebab aku, A dan DR syak dia ikut genetik ayah dia, gastrik. Benda ni dah biasa jadi kan? So aku dah tahu apa nak buat... Aku bagi dia ubat arang, stop dia makan nasik pesemua. Start bagi dia air ORS.
Malam tu mulalah dia ulang alik ke tandas untuk muntah dan muntah dan muntah. Dan sekali lagi aku tekankan, benda ni biasa jadi. Dalan 3 bulan, akan ada sekali waktu macam ni. Dan aku anggap benda ni "normal". Sabtu siang tu macam biasa, aktiviti rumah aku. A pergi shoot sanding pengantin pulak. Yang aku kat rumah dengan anak-anak.Adib still terbaring. Tapi dah nampak tanda dia macam okay. Dan selalu macam tu sebelum ni. Tak putus dengan air ORS 250ml setiap sejam. Aku risau dia hidrasi. Dan dia pun dah tahu apa nak kena buat. Sabtu, klinik kerajaan mana bukak. Dan bapak dia kerja. Jadi aku ambik keputusan untuk tunggu dan lihat. Sepanjang siang tu dia baring dan tido. Aku tak bagi dia main dengan Yeop dan Maya, sebab dia takde tenaga. He was not eating at all. Makan je muntah.
Ayah dia balik petang tu, dia bangun. Dia berdiri depan pintu "ibu, ayah balik". Ayah dia tengok dia boleh bangun so ayah dia assumed hes getting better. And it should be, like it used to be. Malam tu, lebih kurang pukul 10 malam dia bangun taknak tido dah. Adil dan Maya dah tido. So aku dan A teman dia sampai jam 4 pagi. Kejap dia ke akui, kejap dia ke A. Kejap dia tengok Yeop dan Maya. Sampailah pukul 4 tu dia muntah. Sepanjang siang Sabtu tu, dia takde muntah dah ya, takde ke tandas dah. Tapi subuh Ahad tu, dia muntah. Aku dengan A dah barai teruk sebab dari Jumaat kami tak tido temankan dia.
Aku bincang-bincang dengan A lastly kami decide, esok pagi nak bawak dia ke klinik swasta jelah. Nak tunggu kerajaan Isnin baru bukak.
Last aku cakap kat dia, "along nak muntah, muntah kat bakul ni ya. Takyah ke tandas. Ibu nak tido. Ibu dah penat sangat." Dia angguk. So aku dengan A baring. Adib pun ikut baring. Tak lama tu aku terlelap... Dan itulah lelap paling bersalah seumur hidup aku, aku rasakan, dan aku akan bawak sampai mati. Sampai mati.
Pukul 9 pagi Ahad aku terjaga. Aku terus bangun nak check Adib..... Anak aku dah takde weh time tu. Aku jerit panggil A, sampaikan Yeop Maya menangis terkejut aku jerit kuat sangat.... A tried CPR tapi apalah daya seorang ayah yang panik dan dalam hati dah tahu anak dia takde nak CPR. 9.05 pagi A pakai seluar bawak Adib ke hospital. 9.30 pagi DR sahkan anak aku tak balik dah.... Tak hidup dah.
KOSONG
Tu yang aku rasa time tu. Aku panggil Yeop ajak mandi. Aku mandikan Maya. Janggal sangat. Selalunya aku mandikan dorang bertiga, tapi ni, dua batang tubuh badan je aku sabunkan. Dua mulut je aku gosokkan gigi. Dua badan je aku lapkan, aku pakaikan baju. Badan Adib takde.
KOSONG
Laki aku balik peluk aku meraung "anak kita dah takde yang". Pukul 10 pagi camtu A pergi balai, buat report, pukul 11 pagi polis datang rumah, nak tanya pasal semuanyalah. Last yang aku dengar Puan Atikah cakap, kena buat post-mortem seeloknya puan. Sebab si mati bawah 5 tahun. Aku dengan A terus setuju. Sebabnya aku pun nak tahu kenapa anak aku mati tinggal aku tiba-tiba. Pukul 2 petang kami bertolak ke Jabatan Forensik Sungah Buloh, tapi takleh buat time tu. Sebabnya hari Ahad, kami sampai dah petang. Pakar bedah dah balik. So postpone esoknya hari Isnin. Kami balik malam tu sumpah rasa pelik. Kami tinggal berempat. Yang selalunya berebut tilam berebut selimut, tapi malam tu.... Maisng-masing macam bodoh.
Esoknya hari Isnin aku angkut Maya, Yeop ikut sekali... Sebab tulah kali terakhir kami berlima dekat... Settle post-moterm pukul 2 petang kami bertolak balik. Lepas Asar settle solat jenazah, Adib ditanam. Adib memang betul-betul dah takde. Adib memang betul-betul tinggal ibu. Sorry aku takleh nak cerita panjang-panjang, masa taip ni pun biar dah setahun berlalu. Aku still menanhgis setiap kali cakap pasal Adib. Nantilah, ada rezeki aku cerita lain post. Doakan aku sekeluarga terus menerus tabah dan kuat. Doakan kembarnya Muhammad Adil menjadi orang yang paling bahagia dunia dan Akhirat...
"Ya Allah, jadikanlah anakku Muhammad Adib yang telah Kau panggil menjadi penunggu aku di pintu Syurga-Mu kelak"'.
---- Aku doa mintak anak aku jadi anak soleh, Allah bagi aku anak Syurga terus. Allah Maha Baik. Allah ambik Adib buat standby tunggu aku teman aku kat 'sana', Allah tinggalkan Adil kat dunia ni buat tunggu dan teman aku kat sini. Allah Maha Adil. Sesuai dengan nama anak-anakku.. MashaAllah. Alhamdulillah.
...... Sampai jumpa lagi., anak ibu. Tunggu ibu ya... <3
Maya dah 3 bulan. Ya Allah tak tahu nak habaq lagu mana betapa aku makin lega bila she's growing up. Might be because of Kembo dah beso dah 3 tahun, dah tahu semua sendiri. Jadi bila Maya ni ada, aku macam clueless.. Aku dan A boleh tanya each other "how were Kembo back then huh?".
Semua benda aku dan A kena google balik. Sampaikan warna taik pun aku cam clueless, warna kuning mustard ni okay ke tak hah? Hah gitu. Tapi Alhamdulillah. Aku dah makin dapat momentum maya. And she and me are happier now. She's easy to handle now. I almost know what she needs, what she wants.
Dan alhamdulillah, aku still lagi praktikkan apa yang aku buat kat Kembo dulu, which is routine. Ye doh. Terkacau sikit rutin dia, HABIS!!! We're damned! HHAHAHAHAHAHAHQ..
Tapi kadang ada lah jugak masa aku burn out. Aku cam ape ko nak ni???. But yeap. still learning. I am.. Every single day I'm learning new things.
Cuma maya ni aku ralat sikit sebab aku pinjam buai member aku, Eida. Kembo dulu manede buai bagai weh... Kembo dulu elok je letak atas riba dodoi tido. Tido lena plak tu.. Maya jangan harap. Atas riba dia lena lah. Letak je bawah ada lah 10 minit, terus uwakkkk balik..
Tapi aku fahamlah. Sebab dia ada abang dia yang memekak terpekik terlolong. kembo dulu manede sape. dorang jelah.. kalau tido ya jadi sunyilah rumah dah takkan aku dengan A plak nak berkaraoke, anak tido, kan?? Aku dan A pun barai time tu. Sebab first timer as parents.
Mula² tu aku nk deniedlah jugak yang maya ni high need baby. Sebab dia nak aku je. Dengan A kadang okay kadang tak. Tapi memandangkan dia memang high need baby end up aku suren. Aku tanya kat wasap sape ada buai.. Alhamdulillah ramai sangat yang bagi kata semangat, ada yang offer buai. Siap nak bagi terus lagi. Siap suggest beli kat sini here and there. Alhamdulillah sangat².
Aku nak buai ni sebab:
#1 abang dia nak main nak makan nak bercakap nak bergaduh takkan aku nak halang? Kembo ni dah cukup lah bila Maya tido, deme tahu. Kadang deme yang bila aku kelentung kelentang kat dapur: "ibu jangan bising maya tido".
#2 sebab aku nak buat album pengantin. Aku beranak dah tangguh. 3 bulan weh delay album pengantin. Sebab hujung² trimester sebelum Maya aku memang nak berjalan je. A layankan je aku. Dengan aku kesian Kembo tak ke mana².
#3 aku dah makin stress. Sebab aku takleh buat kerja lain. Nak kepit dia je.. lainlah aku ada 4 tangan. Bolehlah 2 tangan dukung, 2 tangan lagi buat kerja. Ni mana mahunya.. Aku jadi stress. Aku rimas. Semua benda aku takleh buat. Aku pahamlah baby ni memang depends on her mother tapi come on, takkan aku nak berak pun kena teran cepat² sebab dia dah melalak? Ko paham tak? Aku makan tak kunyah ya, aku telan je terus.
Jadinya aku ketepikan ego aku, aku ambik buai. Dan alhamdulillah it went well. Aku ada masa untuk diri aku (mandi, makan berak etc). Dan paling utama: AKU ADA MASA UNTUK ANAK SULUNG AKU; ADIL & ADIB.
Tu part paling aku legalah bila berbuai ni. Kembo makin paham bila ibu pegang Maya, Muhammad (bila aku refer to both of them) takleh kacau. Bila Maya dalam buai, ibu boleh layan main menconteng lukis sama². Dan anak² sulung aku makin happy, makin dengar cakap. Sebab ibu layan deme sama macam masa Maya takde lagi...
Aku tak sabar tunggu Maya pandai duduk merangkak. Aku boleh buat kerja rumah sambil dia mengikut aku ke mana aku pergi.. HahahahhahaHqhahahahhqhwhqh..
Hari ni, 21 Ogos 2023, genap Maya 3 bulan. Dan 3 bulan jugak breastfeed dia. Takde campur langsung. ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ tak tau nak cakap macam mana puasnya aku...sebab Kembo dulu kalau tak cukup yang aku pam, topup je susu formula. Sampai 1 tahun aku susukan lepas tu susu aku makin drop. Dan aku dah penat nak tadah breast dekat dorang. Tu pun aku topup, kalau aku fully? Lagi hauk aku rasa.
Kiranya ni salah satu pencapaian terbesar aku, aku nawaitu nak susukan anak aku sepenuhnya. Lagi 3 bulan je lagi, lepas tu Maya dah start makan. Dah tak kesah sangat.
Aku buat jangka pendek punya achivement. Dulu aku expect bigger, when it was not suceed, aku down teruk. Berhari² aku menangis sebab tak dapat susukan Kembo guna badan aku. Yang kali ni, sebab memang nawaitu aku nak susukan Maya sepenuhnya, aku gali ilmu breastfeeding segali² nya. Sampaikan Maya latcthing betul tak betul, aku boleh rasa. Dulu aku main sua je. Tak tahu betul tak betul Kembo hisap.
Ni aku target nak sampai 4 bulan pulak Maya untuk aku susukan sepenuhnya... HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHQHQH OKAY, dahlah.. dah pukul 2 pagi (mak² pahamlah kenapa time² ni still tak tido, sebab time ni je dapat scroll hp). Aku takkan main hp depan Kembo, sebab aku nak hadap Kembo betul². Kejap je dorang dengan aku, tahun depan dah sekolah dah 4 tahun... Dah tinggal aku dengan maya je...
Hmmm..anak soleh ibu, Adil dan Adib dah makin bijak makin membesar . K lah, nak sambung sebak atas bantal plak.
Till then, XOXO..
Assalamualaikum guys. How are you guys doing? Its a good start for 2021, for me. My goal is remain the same: to have a productive life. But.... Still cannot fulfill it. hahahaha
Ok I dowana talk about this pandemic (it scares me). I think I still love blogging. Like come on, I've been blogging since I was 16. Its already 10 years ago. I cannot simply dump this feeling about blog. Eventhough I know not much of us still blog. Most of them turned into vlog. Like who wants to read at 2021? Duhh.. But its okay. I still love to type. hahahahaha
I am thinking of should I change my domain or not. I dont know. I wanna change it to blogeyja.com but its no longer exist. So, I thought about eyjaazman.com since its my official name currently. But, I dont feel like Im in that domain. I dont know. Perhaps cause Ive been with blogeyja for a very long time? So I dont feel like want to change it? I DONT KNOW! So I guess I just gonna let it be blogeyja.blogspot.com dulu kot? .......... Yeah. I stick to blogeyja.blogspot.com dulu....
Cause I dont see how many of you who would still read my blog. I mean if I change it to blogeyja dot com, it is still me. My blog. People can just search blog eyja and taddaaa it will appears. So yeah..
Ok, talk to you later. My twins are already calling me and I am hungry. Byebye.
Wow gambaq ataih kontroversi betul! Kahkahkah. Lantak. Dah nama entry 'Apa Aku Buat Bila Tok Laki Pi Semayang'. So memandangkan hari ni bukan hari acah-acah feeling omputeh dan entri aku dok campuq sat omputeh sat melayu. kita santai-santai ja lah noh. Hari ni 28 Februari 2020, hari Jumaat (rindu tok laki, kaih balik lah abang oi) so dapatlah aku merembat hotspot handphone A dan main computer dia (selalu dia edit gambaq pengantin) so memang takdak chance aku lah nak main computer. So,
WHAT I DO WHEN MY HUSBAND IS NOT WITH ME?
Listening: I Surrender by Aina Abdul: She's a very good singer. Bukan macam certain yang setakat tahu menjerit reach high note je. She;s a good singer. Aku menyanyi jugak (DULULAH! Sekarang dah nak beranak ni takdenya tok laki aku bagi aku nyanyi kat public. kahkahkah) So aku tahulah jugak sikit-sikit cara nak judge seseorang tu memang bagilah lagu apa pun dia boleh bawak, dengan certain genre je dia boleh bawak yang lain haup. So Aina Abdul ni kau campaklah lagu apapun, insyaAllah dia ujenis orang yang boleh perform well.
Reading: Aku banyak membaca article mengenai pregnancy sekarang ni. Dan sekarang ni memang asyik membaca tentang Sign of Contractions (dah nak due date bersalin dah akak ni dik). Sebab ilmu memang takkan cukup dengan setakat bertanya pada nurse dan doktor sahaja, kita kena gali lagi ilmu. Supaya kita tahu apa yang berlaku dengan diri kita dan kandungan kita. badan hang kot, takkan hang tak risau, hang tak tau papa pun. Sat nigh papa jadi lagu mana? Hah, habaq. Banyakkan membaca. Minda tu dah tenat asyik facebook, twitter, instagram je. Membaca. Tak rugi membaca. membaca jambatan ilmu.
Thinking: Dan ka tok laki ceq nak siapkan album pengantin, nak jaga ceq nak beqanak lagi ni, tunaikan tanggungjawab dia kat makpak dia dan mak pak ceq. Nak jaga kucin-kucin lagi. Aku qisau jah orang tua tu tak dan nak siapkan album pengantin. hari-hari dok mikiaq, tak letih ka laki aku. Kesian tengok. Sebab sepanjang mengandung ni, tok laki saya memang tak bagi buat qeja apa dah. menjahit is NO, menyapu is NO, mengemas mendeko is NO, basuh bilik ayaq is NO. Pendek kata everything are NO. Akulah rimaih, dah besa buat qeja laa ni tak bulih tu tak bulih rimaih (kadang dia pergi shoot aku mengemas je, HAHAHAHA) Bukan apa, aku kesiankan dia. Penat. Moga Allah mudahkan setiap satu urusan suami aku. Moga Allah senantiasa lapangkan dada dia. Moga Allah limpah ruahkan lagi rezeki kami sekeluarga. Aaamiinnn
Hoping: I wish my delivery is going well. (serious memang risau sebab 1st pregnancy kan). Tak nak ada apa-komplikasi, dan suami aku dan siapkan album pengantin. Kesian pengantin-pengantin Lensa Manja. Tapi dorang sangat memahami. Serious. Bersyukur sangat-sangat dapat client yang dah jadi cam kawan dah sekarang. Jadi member kamcing. Tapi memang my first priority is my babies. Moga Allah mudahkan urusanku. Ammiinnn..
Feeling: NAK TIDOQ sebab aku dah meluangkan masa tidoq aku tadi dengan main blog. Hahaha Laki den pun dah balik dah ni hah ditogonyo den "aik main blog?" KUIKUIKUI.
Waiting: Orang pasang turbine avent pamenatang tah mai rumah kami. Alah, sat aku tunjuk gambaq lagi senang:-
Hah, menatang ni. Depa janji lepaih semayang depa mai. Uish, hangat ngat-ngat (oqang Kedah takata laguni nah). Betui menepati janji woo. Elok tok laki aku ada dan balik dalam 10 minit, depa mai dah. Baguih. Kami order kat company Melayu (#SupportBMF). Aku ambik gambaq sat depa dok pasang-pasang tu, kalau rajin aku update entry mengenai turbine avent ni (tatau betui ka dak namanya nanti aku tanya tok laki aku)
Wearing: baju tidoq yang hat klawaq menggelebeh tu. hahahaha. Dah duduk rumah, takleh buatpa. Takdak jumpak sapa, hang ingat aku qajin ka nak bersolek?
So, itulah sedikit sebanyak apa yang aku buat bila tok laki aku takdak untuk hari ni... Korang pulak? Apa korang buat untuk hari ni, atau mungkin boleh share kat aku weekend Sabtu Ahad ni hampa pi merayap jalan-jalan makan angin kat mana, aktiviti hampa buat padia.. Kan.... Till later...
Love,
Eyja.
Bismillah. Assalamualaikum. Hello! Masha Allah. It took me forever to update this. It's already the end of the year: 2019 but hey... what's up? It's my first entry. LMFAO.
Well-well-well.. Short but not too short, I am a housewife now. Still menjahit, tapi my own baju. Might start to take an order, while I still can.. I guess??
And I realized now when I am who I am at this moment, I no longer felt like I want or I need to update my social medias, to let my friends know what I am doing. Is that normal? For who has marriage life? Or it is just me, who felt that way?
When I felt like I want to upload a photo or at least to make an insta-story or facebook-story, it just feel like I am wasting my time.. Seriously, is that normal, guys?
Well. I don't know.. At this moment, I get to update my entry beacuse of my husband is not around so I can use his PC. Hahaha. (love you, sayang, come back hurry!)..
So rather than start writing an entry, I edited the codes in my blog and turned Blog Eyja from white background to black background. Hahahahaha. Dan sekarang aku dah sakit pinggang sebab duduk terlalu lama kat kerusi!!! Padan muka. (I'll sleep till evening pasni)
And I didn't even cooked for myself. Lantak kau lapaq satgih Ja!! But I boiled corns at this morning so I believed that fruits gave me a lil bit of calories (I am not even sweating, so don't need too much calories for today)
And I am listening to Selena Gomez not quite new songs: Can't Get Enough right now. And wait, now it's Taylor Swift - 22. Yeap. At this moment, yes. It's Taylor Swift.
Well, above all are not the point. The point is, I just wanted to share my old and lame kenduri kahwin photos. Just to you know, (penuhkan entry) hahaha. So here we go.
So, this is A: the love of my life. My bestest friend I ever have. I wrote in my last entry before this that I had no best girlfriend. Guess what? I need a husband. And my life was completely complete! We have been married for a year and a half now, and we both loving and knowing each other every single day. (cliche but that happened in marriage). Yeah. That's a bit of my kenduri photos that I think this can be a new start for me to you know.. Be more open about my beautiful and amazing life. So that (takyah kau perasan sangat orang lain nak ambik tahu pasal life kau) Hahahaha
So last but not least. Don't judge a person who shares his/her life in facebook or instagram. Because we didn't how hard they've been through or how struggled they life just to be succeed or anything. Just be happy and like their post or if you don't like, just scroll down you freaking timeline or just unfollow them. Don't hurt others feeling. You will never know when is the time that you might scratch others feeling dan berdosa okay??? Buat orang sakit hati... Be happy or remain silent. That's better. (rasa cam ahli falsafah or ahli psikologi plak aku) Well.. Till then guys.
Love,
Eyja
P/S: Thank you so so so much to whoever read this entry (cause I know my blog hasn't been updated time-to-time). Thank you so so so so sooo much. <3
Well. I don't know.. At this moment, I get to update my entry beacuse of my husband is not around so I can use his PC. Hahaha. (love you, sayang, come back hurry!)..
So rather than start writing an entry, I edited the codes in my blog and turned Blog Eyja from white background to black background. Hahahahaha. Dan sekarang aku dah sakit pinggang sebab duduk terlalu lama kat kerusi!!! Padan muka. (I'll sleep till evening pasni)
And I didn't even cooked for myself. Lantak kau lapaq satgih Ja!! But I boiled corns at this morning so I believed that fruits gave me a lil bit of calories (I am not even sweating, so don't need too much calories for today)
And I am listening to Selena Gomez not quite new songs: Can't Get Enough right now. And wait, now it's Taylor Swift - 22. Yeap. At this moment, yes. It's Taylor Swift.
Well, above all are not the point. The point is, I just wanted to share my old and lame kenduri kahwin photos. Just to you know, (penuhkan entry) hahaha. So here we go.
Love,
Eyja
P/S: Thank you so so so much to whoever read this entry (cause I know my blog hasn't been updated time-to-time). Thank you so so so so sooo much. <3
- getting married
- moved to my husband's house at Perak.
- H & M were no longer mine (dad didn't allowed me to bring them)
- I adopted new cats: T & D (I cannot live without cats near me, daaa!!!)
- I am a tailor now (plus still an assistant photographer for my husband)
Errr, that was huge moments, aite? But nevermind.
So, since I didn't give a little shit about my blog, so the domain name was expired and I cannot use that name anymore, so I ll stick to blogeyja.blogspot.com for a while (or maybe forever???) because I have to priorities my money, and domain name is not included, so yeah...
Anyways, I will post more (I am scared to tell my husband that I blogged behind him). I think I am gonna type using a phone.. We will see bout that.
Oh, I might blog just about me, what I do what I say yada yada.. There is no collaboration with any company anymore, 'cause I know I cannot commit. So, apologise for whoever want me to review or advertise, I am truly sorry, because I have not so plenty time to cooperate. (I am sure that many other bloggers will review and advertise for you due to their pageviews)
So, that is it till now.
Talk to you later, bye :)
Oh, I might blog just about me, what I do what I say yada yada.. There is no collaboration with any company anymore, 'cause I know I cannot commit. So, apologise for whoever want me to review or advertise, I am truly sorry, because I have not so plenty time to cooperate. (I am sure that many other bloggers will review and advertise for you due to their pageviews)
So, that is it till now.
Talk to you later, bye :)
Hi guys. It's already in the middle of 2018, but I didn't post anything yet. I have 24 hours a day just like you all, but I still cannot managed my time perfectly. I failed.. Again.. I guess. Nevermind.
Anyways, how are you guys doing? I hope it is fine. :) The reason why I write this is because, I got my laptop back. LMAO. But yeah, A took my laptop to susun album and do our photography stuff, 'cause I didn't do anything on my laptop, so yeah, he borrowed. So this puasa, he's not using my laptop due to kena meniaga bazaar for our duit kahwin (no lah, dia memang meniaga bazaar tiap Ramadhan :p). So he gave me my laptop back 'cause I'm the one yang akan susun all the gambar and stuffs (eventhough I belajar di GiatMARA untuk SKM 3, but still.. Work has to be done)
So yeah, that is the biggest reason why I didn't blog for a pretty long time. Oh God, I miss my blog. So much. I miss reading other bloggers's posts. I miss commenting on their blog posts. I miss edit my template in the 2 AM in the morning. I literally cried bila bukak blogger.com
I don't know what to membebel lagi, I just nak cakap that thing. And I just nak type something. I miss my blogger life. But I have to balance between my current life and my needy life. Because, everything have changed. I no longer in a position that I can write in blog without being worry about other things. Sekarang ni pun time I tengah type, I still pikirkan album pengantin, still pikirkan baju-baju yang perlu dijahit. Penat namatey, tapi this is a life that I chose. Luckily, I have a man who supports me on doing what I love to do. And the best part, A pun menjahit macam aku. So yeah, thank you God for giving me this man: A <3
So, talk to you soon or later, and whoever reading this, I hope you have a lovely life and dirahmati Allah dan jugak diberikan kesihatan yang baik. :)
Love, Eyja
Hi guys! This is going to be my first entry since the last entry I posted was about a month ago??? (sorry!!!) Well. For the past... I don't know, two to three weeks ago or even worst, two to three months ago was a very-very not me. Me was not being me. Y'all know what am I saying, right?? Blurrffff...
I've been searching for myself like crazy... I don't know what I want.. I don't know what I need... I don't even know apa yang aku nak mintak kat Tuhan... I lost, dude. I do.
It was so freakin hard weh to get up and move on and do what I need have to do. It's already September 2017 but still, I didn't archieved what I supposed to archieve. Well, yeah. I have done my degree life and felt relived bila settle semua on degree life #roadtoconvo (tapi taknak update kat socmed sebab ada kawan aku yang tak dapat nak merasa U life and felt kesian dengan dorang kalau dorang nampak gambar aku sana sini lama-lama jadi menyampah pulak) (later I post entry bout this stuff)
But still, I have nothing.. I mean I felt like I did nothing. Yet..
#1
I didn't get any offer for a job. And even if I do, I still couldn't go to. Sebab my job opportunities mostly banyak dan cerah kat KL dan Shah Alam, which was, yeah. My mom didn't allowed me to go far from her. So yeah, I packed my stuffs at Shah Alam and I returned.. Home...
You know, eventhough at that time, I felt macam bodoh gile left all of my living life there, but still. I was okay and I was doing fine. (I guess because of mom's blessings?? who knows right?) She claimed that I didn't belong there sebab tiap minggu dan pantang cuti je aku mesti balik. So yeap. It might be one of the reason, kan???
#2
Mom asks me to follow the tradition which is menjahit. Yeap. She even asked me to sign up for a sewing lesson. So yeah, I guess it leads to #1 when she ordered me to come home. You know... To help and collaborate with her. (menjahit is fun! seriously!)
#3
Our photography business were so busy namapus like busy gila I cant even have one day rest!! Nope! Monday till Friday are my sewing lesson class, Saturday and Sunday are when I am at kenduri, and tangkap gambar people. So yeah. No rest day or even a cheat day (bukan cheat day untuk orang diet ke??) But, but, but. It was so much fun. Penat! Tipu kalau tak penat. Tapi ni kan dunia je. Nanti kat Akhirat rehatlah puas-puas. And this #3 will leads to #4 nanti.
#4 - this is the positive point :)
I've gained so many experiences! I explored so many places eventhough the places was near to my house. Seriously weh, you don't have to travel far to collect experiences and explore new things. You just have to stop and look around you. There are so many pengalaman yang you boleh kutip. Takyah nak travel jauh-jauh semata-mata nak ikut orang lain dan setakat nak upload gambar kau travelled kat socmed kau. Serious. Take a look around you.
#5
I am no longer a planner addict. With my very tight schedule buat aku takde masa langsung untuk tulis cantik-cantik planner aku. (so rugi sebab dengan planner sedikit sebanyak life kau akan teratur). So I tried my best untuk carik masa tulis planner aku (pray for me!)
#etc
And there is many more tapi tak nak cakap kat sini, 'cause it's quite personal. SO yeah. At the age of 21 23, I felt like I ruined my life. But it's a lesson, kan? I make mistakes, but it's okay. It is a learning process. So, what have you doing for these couple of weeks? :) Feel free to share it with in the comment down below! <3
Kindly,
Eyja
"I am leaving". said Cbox to me.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Indeed, I no longer have Cbox widget in my blog.
Felt relieved, but at the same time. I felt lost 'cause I relied so much to it before this. But nevermind. It will heal.
Thank you Blogger Utara familia sebab adviced me to remove my Cbox. Love you guys!
p/s: Pasni comment kat post saya ya kalau nak bagitahu yang korang ada jejak Blog Eyja Dot Com/ Okay! <3
Hai assalamualaikum everybody! MasyaAllah, it has been soooo long since I didn't update my entries. I am truly apologize for not posting any entries because, I have been so sibuk not tooo sibuk but I couldn't find the right and perfect time to update my blog...
There are lots of draft posts that I have saved a long time ago. But I couldn't published it due to:
- internal hard disk laptop rosak
- internet slow gile namatey sebab dia update apentah for like 2 months!!!
- settle everything down kat U sebab dah habis belajar
- dapat
wahyuakal untuk belajar "FnD" (let it remain secret) kat Giatmara puleks (I got no rest okay!) - buat 3rd job as an assistant for K
- I sucks at managing my time
- tak jadi nak publish post sebab dah tak ingat dalam post tu nak sembang pasal apa
- dan the major reason is have no mood to write down. (like balik, penat, mandi solat makan tidoq tak sdaq pa!)
Yessss...... Finally I felt so relieved dapat luahkan pasaipeeeee tak boleh nak update blog.And one more thing that made me so lega was I made a second blog!!!!!!
Just for my bloglists...
I know, cool, right? :P. I got this tips from my blogger family which is Blogger Utara.. To put bloglists in another blog. SO that tak serabut. And yes... Tak serabut... Whenever I want to stalk people, I will just straight away go to my second blog and scroll my bloglists and then... Walahhhhh.
So guys, feel free to visit my second blog if in case you have no idea who you want to stalk, nak tengok blog orang, searching for new ideas etc.
I hope you may find new blogging friends when you click their names on my second blog and perhaps ideas to post new entry,,,,, get inspire your desire living la vida on how they designed their blog and stuffs..
Because those are all the blogs that Blog Eyja Suka.
Kindly,
Eyja
Eyja
Assalamualaikum hi peeps. Whatchu doing? Have youjoin my segmen? Click here if you wanna join Segmen: Blog Eyja Dot Com Carik Bloglist. It's a very simple rule yet it's gonna be fun!
Btw, I am super busy during this upcoming Ramadhan, like freaking busy! I can't even scroll my twitter more than 15 minutes. Soooo not a social person anymore. Like sedih jugak kadang, I'm like not having my normal life (normal ke?) by scrolling phone, sleep, blog, watching a TV (like seriously Jaa, that's not normal!)
I am going to make a post about those who willing to answered my Blue Sky Tag post (thank you for answering my 11 questions, loveeeeeee <3)
And I am going to pick 5 blogs from bloggers who joined my Segmen: Blog Eyja Dot Com Carik Bloglist and I am going to make a review about their blog and I am going to pick some winners to win ringgit prices!!!!! OMG Gilekau tak nak join? So let's join!
And many other posts that I am going to proofread and publish soon! (it has been on my draft for a veeeeery long time!)
And and and I am trully sorry for cannot make any effort to join any segmen or giveaway that has been invited by other bloggers. Itu adalah kerana kesibukan saya yang melampau takut tak terterjah blog-blog yang join. That's why I am doing my own segmen so that I can stalk you guys whenever I want. Hihihi. (kalau ada masa, insyaAllah eyja akan join untuk support kome :*)
Tapi tulah, masalah sikit, tempat eyja takde strong lne untuk Yes eyja untuk beroperasi yang membolehkan eyja main blog pesemua, twitter pun tak jalan tau kat tempat eyja!!! :'( I really want to to blogging and blogging but with no Internet, what can I do?
And and and I am trully sorry for cannot make any effort to join any segmen or giveaway that has been invited by other bloggers. Itu adalah kerana kesibukan saya yang melampau takut tak terterjah blog-blog yang join. That's why I am doing my own segmen so that I can stalk you guys whenever I want. Hihihi. (kalau ada masa, insyaAllah eyja akan join untuk support kome :*)
Tapi tulah, masalah sikit, tempat eyja takde strong lne untuk Yes eyja untuk beroperasi yang membolehkan eyja main blog pesemua, twitter pun tak jalan tau kat tempat eyja!!! :'( I really want to to blogging and blogging but with no Internet, what can I do?
Nowadays, there is a lot of people who succeed. Not only in terms of career but also in marriage, happiness and lot of things. However, people who fail either they realize or not, still exist. So, I have listed types of people who fail, maybe in their studies or career or anything else. But still, fail. Below are the characteristics of people who fail. Do check out if you have one of these charaters :P
People who fail will always give up. No matter what they try to do, they always give up in the middle of their journeys.
Listen to others. People who fail tend to listen to what others said. They always think pf what people said or even think about them.
People who vividly fail when they follow other people rules to be use on their daily lives! Which is so pathetic because they cannot think or decide for their ownself.
Delaying time is one of the characteristics of people who fail. It is because they love delay to do stuffs that needs to be done.
People who we can see they failed is people who quick to satisfied on what they have doing. They'll be, "its okay, takde rezeki." bleh bleh bleh..
Lazy people is the people who tend to fail in everything they do. Because lazy is one of the worst disease.
A lot of excuses that these people make is also the characteritics of people who fail.
They like themselves. They think that they are alway right. And every mistakes is because of someone's fault, not them.
Nobody likes a failure. Because if the failure is the good character, other people will accept that behaviour.
People who fail tend to not trust their ownself. How can other people trust them when they cannot even trust themselves?
Have no guts is the people who tend to fail. They too scared to do anything because they afraid of being judged.
Do not want to try to explore new things. They have been scared to try something else without realize it will make their development stucks.
All things are so hard for them. They tend to always compalin that this one is hard, that one is hard too. Because they do not want to give chance for themselves to change.
So, these are the characterisitics of people who fail. Do you guys think is there any characteristics that alo can be concluded into this? Let me know :)
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